Thursday, December 15, 2016

Dear DIARY,

Among my Senior High gang's friends, I'm the only single one left.
My other seven friends have got married and had children.
Thus, it's quite difficult for us to get together for some reasons.

need permission from husband
no one to take care the kids
couldn't stay long because husband and kids are calling

I do understand those reasons. That's why I never get angry whenever we had to cancelled our meet and greet for the reasons, and even though it had been planned a month before.
I always said to them, "Pick the date and time, I can always go since I'm still a single fighter."

This weekend, one of my friend would held her 7th month pregnancy celebration. It's one traditions in Indonesia. I've informed the date to my other friends. Some said they could come. I said we can all meet at our friend's house, where the event would be held. I said that since I was used to come all by myself, no need to wait husband or kids to be ready. Then a friend said we should just arranged an appointment and go together.

"Why do you have to come all by yourself?"

I agreed we would meet somewhere and go together. Then I confirmed about the event to my friend. She suddenly said the day has been changed, from Saturday to Sunday. I rushed to inform my friends, and as I expected...they couldn't come, because they all already have schedule for the day.

At that point I tried to understands their issues. I will still be going since I don't have anything to do on Sunday. But words from a friend annoyed me...

"It's like what you wish for, you'll be going alone :)"

I interpreted it as a sarcasm, because I've said from the start that we all just meet at my friend's house. No need to arranged a meeting before. I choose that way in order to make it easier for them, to come straight from their home, together with their family, no need to wait anyone at anyplace. But, I feel her saying that because I've been a smart-ass for wanting to come alone...

I feel heart broken. Disappointed.

Maybe I was being too sensitive with the matters I've been having through out the weeks. That a small chat, might be a harmless chat, with no intention to hurt anyone, could made me annoyed and heart broken. But, it isn't the first time happened with the gangs. And I always at the side to understands, while it seemed they use "family" as an excuse.

It made me think, do marriage really change people?
If it is, that adds reasons why I don't like it.

No comments: