Wednesday, October 31, 2012

My Ghostly Story: Hana-chan.

Since it's Halloween I want to share one of my experience ghost story.
It has happened a long time ago, during my college.
Here's the story.


Me and some friends are going to near by internet cafe around the campus. The cafe is located quite hiding out. It's not the first time we're going there.

When we enter the cafe, the place is already full. We can't get places that close to each other. We get separated. I get the one in the back. I see across my place is an empty cubicle, no computer, no chair, no table, just an empty cubicle. I talk to myself,

"If it's in a horror movie, something might appear there" *giggles*

I start to browsing the net. Several minutes later, my eyes caught a glance of something standing by close to me. I turn to look and see no one there. I turn back to the monitor, and again "it" appears. I slightly take a look at "it". It's a little girl. Her appearance is so dark like a shadow, so I can't clearly see her face. To be short she quite resembles of Hanako, one of Japanese's ghost.

I don't feel comfortable with Hana-chan's standing and looking at me. I decide to end my session and quickly to one of my friend. My friend is surprise that I finish so quickly. I told her that I feel bored. I didn't tell the true reason, and I eventually forget Hana-chan.

Days later ...

1st brother along with his wife and little daughter were spending nights on his in law house. So his room which lies beside mine has been empty. I always like the room. It has a chill air and always feel cold. Maybe because it's located near the fish pond?

So one night I slept at 1st brother's room. I sleep so well until I feel someone shakes my bed. As if to wake me up. I thought it's 3rd bro who teasing me. I ignore the shake. It keeps happening, and I keep ignoring it. Then someone get a grip on my ankle and shake it. I toss it away but the grip didn't want to let go. I feel upset and wake up,

"What the hell do you want..."

I see it ... her ... Hana-chan ... holding my ankle. She's still all black just like the first time I saw her.
I froze for a moment. I slowly toss the grip, it let's go (!), get up and walk out from the room. 2nd bro who's watching TV felt surprised to see me woke up.

"What happen? Are you feeling hot?" 

I look at the time. It's midnight.
I enter my room where mother was sleeping and continue my sleep there with holding mother's hand.


Another day, I've come back from campus and enter my room. It's dark so I turn on the light. A dark shadow quickly fly away from my sight. I stunned. Is it Hana-chan again?

Since then Hana-chan doesn't show up. Another one show up instead, adult version. It's often happen, but that's another story to tell.

Happy Halloween!
Trick or Treat?

I choose treat! (X3)

- KiRaidesu -

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Indian GP: Depressing!

Watching Indian GP today.
Kimi started from P7.

The start of the race was quite thrilling. Of course my eyes never went away from Kimi.
He pushes hard, trying to squeeze through to the front.
He stayed 7th till the end of the race.

After the race, I can feel how depressing it is to drive behind someone else car!
I bet Kimi was feeling the same.
Can't pass. Can't overtake.
Can only drive along from the back.
It's depressing!!

Hope the next one will be  better for Kimi.
Hope he can have a fun and exciting race.
Hope he can get better result.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Look "below" and not UP

Her: "I envy with people who don't have a father. I hate my father" 
Me: "Go and say that to my little niece that had lost her father when she's 6 years old" 


Her: "Maybe it's lucky to be like you. Living only with your mother. Mothers are always more enjoy to live with" 
Me: "You don't know what you are saying"


Seriously, someone need to knock that brat's head!

If she really hate her father...if she really want to kill her father...just do it!
Don't bug me every single morning with the same moaning!


"I hate him."
"I want to kill him."
"How can my mother be so stupid to marry him?"
"I don't have respect on him"
"I haven't speak with him for years" 


So? Why the hell I should care?
She can hate and kill her father. I won't care.
She doesn't speak to her father. What that got to do with me?
Is she looking for a sympathy?



Her: "It's lucky to be like you. You don't have any problem,"
Me: "You can say that because you're having a problem. Try to look at other people's condition when you aren't having it. You'll feel lucky." *holding the desire to kill her*


Yeah, I often get the same words.
People said it's nice to be me, don't have a problem, don't have debt, etc.

I seem don't have a problem because I'm not a cry baby who talk about it every time it happens.
I seem don't have any debt because I don't bragging what I've been using my money for.

Really, don't look at other people's life while you're having your own problem. You would feel unsatisfied with life, envy, and upset.
Other people's life aren't always as good as you think, or as smooth either as easy as you think.
You're seeing it that way because you can't handle your own problem. You're feeling sorry for yourself by comparing your misfortune with others luck. So people who listen would give sympathy and think you are indeed the misfortune person in the galaxy. I Pity you.

Then, have you think it this way?

That you are quite lucky than the poor who even don't know what they are going to eat, or can they eat?
Those people are struggling everyday to live, while you're complaining about how to kill your father? How many works you should do? How tired you are?

There's a wise words saying,

"Don't look at people above you, but look at those below you."

It means, don't look at rich people or those who are seem so easy living their live. You will always feel unsatisfied. But look at people below you, the poor. Who are struggling everyday, and can't enjoy even the slightest luxury you might having everyday. Then you will feel lucky.

Don't compare your life with other people. Your life is yours. Their life is theirs. Just live it!

I hope someone would knock that brat sense's soon. I can't stand keep being like now.


Her: "Yay! I succeed to make you upset."


So, you want to see me upset? Okay. YOU WILL HAVE IT BRAT!! 

Satsuki's 1st Album: Luminous

TABOO is dead. It won't go on.

Came home late last night after round and round with Jhutex.

Get annoyed this morning by that brat.

Need to buy new flash disk.

Great day. What's next?


A ray of light flashing in...the angel has come...

LUMINOUS. Satsuki's 1st full album. Will going to be release on January 9th, 2013.


The preview of the album is here.

In the album, Satsuki includes Sympathy, Romance, FATE, and... Inside!!
I didn't know he plays the piano in the song! (*O*).
I really really love Inside. I'm very happy Satsuki has include it for the album. Arigatou!!

Can't wait for the release. Can't wait to see the new video. Why it has to be in January? Why not next month?

As if I don't have list of things I have to get... *scroll up*

But, I've said that if Satsuki shall release his first full album, then I will be surely going to get it! I've promise it!! So I will keep my promise! I can't wait to have the angel's voice sounding in my house! (^O^).

Thank you for the happiness, Sacchan! Thank you! You are really an angel!

Sacchan's new look reminds me of Rentrer en Soi's old times! 
Beautiful angel!! 

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Happy Birthday Maonyan!

I always remember one quote from Maonyan (SHIDO no vocal).

"If you think "this is tough", even once halfway, you'll lose. Clear your heart and keep thinking of happy things"

I always remember the words every time I feel distress with my works.

Will I able to do it?
Will I make it?
Will everything goes well?

With his words, Maonyan snaps me and said,

"Just do it and don't think too much!" 

Arigatou, Maonyan :)

Maonyan is someone that truly care and think deeply about others. He always give encouraging words.

"Let's do our best today"
"People on the way, students at school, let's do our best" 

Those were some of his words that I remember.
And somehow, just by that words, it gave me strength, courage, and confidence.
Everything will be okay as long as I've tried and work hard.  
That's what I learn from him.
Haven't been doing it *smacked* but the words keep encourage me.

Maonyan also teaches the value of hard work. The work he's been doing until he get to be known just like now. Awesome!

Maonyan also easily feel lonely. I don't understand why.
For someone who cares so much for other people, and also have receive back many many love, why he feel alone?

Then today is there to show how he's being love by many people. So he won't feel alone anymore.

Happy birthday Maonyan~~
May you always live happily and healthy.
Don't go on diet for any longer. You already looking fine at the moment. (^^)

Monday, October 22, 2012


Please, tell me how to help you.
Please, tell me how to convince you that I will always be around?
Please, tell me how to say that I won't gonna leave you?
Please, tell me how to show that I won't ever get bored of you?
Please, tell me how to make you believe my words are true?

I've said that I would be your trash can.
You can share anything with me.
You can shout at me if it will make you better.
I was around back then, and I will always still be around.

I know words are easier to say than to do.
So, please let me show it.
Please...tell me how?

Friday, October 19, 2012

[Lyric] Rest in Peace and Fly Away

Rest in Peace and Fly Away
SUGIZO feat Bice


Cry soshite mezamete Fly away

Kimi o ushinatte toki wa kooritsuita mama de
Kizu o motometemo doku ni mamiretemo
Dakedo ima wa

(Sukoshi dake) Kima ga michibiitekureta
(Sukoshi dake) Michi ga mieru


Douka koe o omoidashite
Itsuka utagoe o kikasete ne
Boku wa mou daijoubu dakara
Nido to tojinaide zutto aruiteku kara
Cry soshite mezamete Fly Away

(Sukoshi dake) Kimi to hanarete ikiteku
(Sukoshi dake) Yuuki ga mieru


Douka tsumi o furihodoite
Itsuka itami mo yurushiteagete ne 
Boku wa mou daijoubu dakara
Nido to tojinaide zutto aruiteyuku kara

Tooku hanaretemo zutto aishiteiru yo
Itsuka futari mou ichidou deaeru kara

Fly soshite mezamete Fly Away
Futari no mirai soshite habataite Fly Away 

English translation: 

Cry, and awaken Fly Away

I missed you, as if time were frozen
Withing for wounds, even for poisons
but now

(Just a little) You showed me the way
(Just a little) I can see the path


Please remember my voice

Someday listen to my singing, okay?
Because I'm alright now
Don't shut me out twice because we're always walking
Cry, and awaken Fly Away

(Just a little) I can live apart from you
(Just a little) I can see courage


Please abandon my sins
Someday, give me forgiveness for the pain
Because I'm alright now
Don't shut me twice because we're always walking on

Even if we part far away, I'll still always love you
Because someday we'll meet once more

Fly, and awaken Fly Away
It's our future, so flap your wings and Fly Away

Source: here


It's another version of the song with the same title from the album, "SOUNDTRACK". Quite different with the original, this version is more cheerful. 

Though at first I don't know the meaning of the words, but I can feel the positive feeling within the music. Especially when it play at the end of the movie. The words above really describe what happen next for Sion and the other Misa. 

I can't say more...just...Beautiful. 

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Happy Birthday Dearest One

Dearest one.
Greatest one.
Only one.
The best one.

Kimi Raikkonen.


May you'll have a long, happy, and prosperous live.
May you always be healthy.
May you always stay the way you are.

Thank you.

Thank you for always being the true you.
Thank you for being an inspirations.
Thank you for the thoughts and the acts that makes you unique.
Maybe you don't feel you've done something incredible, that you only do what you want to do.

"I'm just being me."

You may think it's not a big deal.
That's what make you great.

You are very honest. With your own feeling, with everything.
Sometimes you are also arrogant and do stupid act. Still I love you.
You never hate people, even after people hurt you.
You never talk about people's bad, though they always looking for your's bad.
You never blame people. even though they blame on you.
You are so kind.

You are so strong.
Always walk on the path you've choose.
Never give a mind about what people said about you.
You always keep your head held high, walking straight forward to what you want to achieve.

I always wonder and really want to ask it someday when I can meet you,

"Please tell me how you can be that strong?"

Happy birthday My world. My shining sun. My air to breathe. My light. My everything.
I always love you. Forever. And ever.
The pledge I've once made to you, will always be yours. Eternally.

"Will always be with you, through the good and the bad."

Wherever you go, whatever you choose to do, will always follow and support you fully.

"Someone I can love from my heart. Someone I love from my heart. In the center of my love, you, my heart, are there."

Special place, for a very special person.

May Allah always bless you.
I love you.

Monday, October 15, 2012


Friday afternoon, after having a meeting, I decided to went round and round inside the mall. My destinations were stores. Maybe I would get J-Rock's imported CD or DVD.
But, it's a wishy washy...didn't found any J-Rock's CD or DVD. Even, the music stores were less visitors! I was the only one there!! (O_O).

A long time ago, music stores were still having lots of visitors. I even come to visit every once a week. It felt so nice to walk between the albums.

I realize things have changed when online shops started to grow.
People rarely go to music stores because now they can make an online order.

And with the technology development aka downloading...people can't get music without buying it...

But, even until now, my favorite destinations when I walk around are the music stores and book stores. At the music stores, I might accidentally find good things, such as nice headphones or rare Japanese album like these below (X3).

Luna Sea's cassette: Lunacy (red one) and Period (white one).


X Japan Best Fan Selections (2 cassette).

Though it's still in an old form, but until now, it still my valuable collections (X3)

Hoping to accidentally found many other rare Japanese album (X3)

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Picture of the day: LUNA SEA

I just realize it now...
I didn't notice it when I first saw it.
I was too excited with the news about their 2013 Asia Tour, that I didn't realize there's something with the picture below...

Can anyone see it?

SUGIZO is holding a cane (!).

It's the injury he had before his last live....
He's forcing himself to work....

I hope his injury will fully heal before the start of their tour.
Don't want to see him in pain... (TwT)

SUGIZO-san, heal soon. Eat well. Rest well.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Luna Sea: to the new moon

Finally it has been confirmed today.

Luna Sea will have a live in Singapore, February 8th, 2013.

Full article here (Indonesian only).

The last stop...
Why it had to be the last stop?

I'm hoping they would put Jakarta on the list. Just like L'Arc~en~Ciel did.

A friend is making plan to watch the live in Singapore. She said to pursuit our dreams, we have to risk everything. She wants to see Inoran. While I want to see SUGIZO.

Ryu-chan suggest me to talk with Diana-chan or her sister about it. Big chances that Ryu-chan's sister will go to Singapore for the live.

Should I go too?

I didn't catch L'Arc~en~Ciel in Singapore. Then again, the rainbow had a live in Jakarta, so I don't see the need to go to Singapore.

But, it's small chance now that Luna Sea would have a live in Jakarta. Especially when they already stated. "the last stop".

Maybe I'll just wait for further information? Maybe somehow they would add Jakarta on the list?
or maybe I just wait for X Japan to come? Big chance for the legend to come since Yoshiki once said he's interested to come. But, I'd choose to see SUGIZO with Luna Sea. I'm more familiar with Luna Sea's songs.

Argh!!!! *pulling hair*

I'm confused!
Honey, tasukete!!

Tuesday, October 09, 2012

Today: restless

Head feels so dizzy and instead of continue working, I made this post instead. Good job! *smacked by Boss*

What a restless day.

This morning being bother daily moans from a childish brat.

Then continue with announcement from Luna Sea that they have start recording for a new album. It's for next year. And they will release new single in this year December.

Also tomorrow, the band is also supposed to announced their World Tour schedule, and one of it is... Singapore!


After being obsessed with SUGIZO, listening to Luna Sea all over again, hoping they would work on new songs...I get answers for all of my thinking. Awesome!

I really really hope they would have a live in Indonesia.
The thinking of going abroad to watch a live isn't going to get approval by honey (read: Kimi) *smacked*

Sugi-chan, I really really want to see the live.
I want to see you play the guitar and violin. Wanna see your goofy act, and also your sweet sweet interaction with Ryuichi! (>//////////<)

So...please come to Indonesia! PLEASE!!

(review) BUNRAKU

The only reason I’m watching the movie is because of Gacchan aka Gackt!! And after doubting the movie would get to local movie theater, finally it came! Bunraku can be watch in local movie theater! Hurray!

Actually I’ve watched the movie on Ni-chan’s DVD, but I just can’t help it to watch it in properly big screen with decent English translations (^^)

I watched the movie after the J-Melo Fan Meeting. I took the risk to watch it alone in the night. But, it’s Gackt in local cinemas! There’s no way I would pass it by!!

The story is about a certain city rule by someone with the name, “Woodcutter”. Woodcutter rules the city with his ten killers and a numbers of “red army”. This Red Army often scares and took advantage from the town people. That’s when Yoshi (Gackt) appeared. Yoshi came to the city to look for his ancestor’s missing medallion. He visited his uncle restaurant and get into a fight with the Red Army.

At the same time, a strange cowboy (Josh Harnet) also came to the city in pursuit for the Woodcutter (his intention is reveal at the end of the movie). Yoshi and the Cowboy met in a bar whose bartender likes to make a paper book doll. At first Yoshi and the Cowboy were fighting each other, but as they see each other power, they start to work together. Their target is the same, the medallion that Yoshi been looking for was indeed on Woodcutter’s hands.

Friday, October 05, 2012

Thursday, October 04, 2012

My (music) Bad Habit.

It's bad habit.

I always look or listen to something else when any of fandom I'm following start to get crowded.
I'd choose to get myself away from the excitements that happens.


When L'Arc~en~Ciel fandom is being rushy, I move to another, take example SID.
Then when SID's fandom is also getting rushy, I look at another: Acid Black Cherry.
And on...

So the bands I've been following now is none the less are because of my music bad habit (XD)

The currently that result from it is... SUGIZO.

But, from what fandom I'm getting away? That is...a secret *smacked*

Wednesday, October 03, 2012

Happy Birthday Banana!

Happy birthday to Tetsuya Ogawa, the super fantastic leader of L'Arc~en~Ciel.

The creator of the rainbow.
The captain of the ark.
The mother,  The watcher, The protector, The healthiest, and The Juiciest Banana in the whole universe!

For the most...


My one and only leader.

Thank you for everything you've done, with the band and with your solo works.
Thank you for bringing smile and cheerfulness.
Thank you for sharing your smile and energy.

Will always counting on you forever.
Will always support you forever.

Happy birthday, Leader.
May you'll always be healthy and happy. May you always be successful in everything you do. May all of your plans goes well!

Thank you so much dearest Leader! WASSHOI!!!

Tuesday, October 02, 2012


I hate it when I'm obsessed with something or someone. In that condition, I would only do certain act or look at certain person.

For now...I'm obsessed with... SUGIZO.

How come?

It started when several days ago he tweeted his injured ankle. I quickly get touched and started to listen his music (again). I do love his violin's play. He's so sexy when he played the instrument! I can get blush just watching him plays violin (>w<). I love his violin's play, but other than that...his music is difficult to listen...Techno and experimental music aren't the kind of music that easily accepted by my ears. And that's how SUGIZO's music sounds....

I like what SUGIZO's doing with The Spank Your Juice. He was really hilarious in "Super Love" video! He's dancing!! I like his voice there, it's so funny! It's my most favorite work of him. If I need entertainment that can make me smile, I will watched the video (XD).

My favorites so far are Super Love, Dear Life, No More Machineguns Play The Guitar (rocking sounds!!), and his music on Soundtrack's movie.

The last one was his movie. Yes... SUGIZO has played in at least two movies. He played the main role in Soundtrack, and became a cameo in somekind of mystery movie (forget the title, but Chiaki Kuriyama was on it too). SUGIZO is also played in an opera, "Bluebeard's castle" and has made the soundtrack. Aren't he awesome?  

I realize that SUGIZO is a very loving person, especially after the born of his daughter, Luna Artemis Sugihara. He really really love his daughter. He even made a beautiful song about her. He's a sweet J-Rock father!! I wonder Luna's feeling to have such cool, loving, and good looking father. I once saw a picture of grow up Luna and SUGIZO together. It's so sweet! Luna has the same face line with her father, a long and hard line. I bet whoever want to get close to Luna, will quickly lost confidence when they know or  meet her father (XD).

SUGIZO has admitted that he was a stupid one during his young times. And that has change after Luna was born. He started to give deep attention about the future, especially for Luna's future. So SUGIZO started to become more concern with the environment and political issues. He uses music to spread out the concerns and brought the awareness. He's like Bono from Japan (^^). And because of him, several times I've signed petition from Greenpeace. It's an ordinary petition that anyone can easily sign. But SUGIZO was the one who made me aware. He also had his profile put in Greenpeace's website page.

I can see the changes on him. From a goofy guitarist into a cool and mature musician. Now he has a serious and scary look, but his voice and gesture is still gentle (I'm surprised!). And his music also change. It becomes serious and complicated (which I hardly understand but keep listen it).

To be honest, it's quite difficult for me to listen to SUGIZO. And tt's not because of the music, but because every time I watch him, see his performance especially with Luna Sea, I can't help it to get annoyed.


Because SUGIZO is the member of a band that dearly love by the person I've lost...Ryu-chan.

I always remember about Ryu-chan when I listen to SUGIZO and Luna Sea. I become to remember how I've lost her. It makes me sad and completely annoyed. That's why I've stopped listening to SUGIZO and Luna Sea.

But, lately I feel I can finally get over the feeling, though there's still little remains.

SUGIZO's violin has saved me. His play is so beautiful that I've choose it to enter my heart and replace the annoyed feeling.

Just like what I've said a long time ago to Ryu-chan:

"Sugizo is a kind of man that too hot to get pass" 


I really want to told SUGIZO about how his music has saved my heart. But, I don't want to bother him with my cheesy I would only say thank you.

"Thank you so much for saving my heart, SUGIZO-san" 

Monday, October 01, 2012

J-Melo Fans Meeting in Jakarta

I have the honor to attend the J-Melo Fans Meeting on September 29th, 2012. I was invited by Dona-chan. She’s Ni-chan’s friend. I feel so grateful that Dona-chan is willing to asked me to go to the event. I quickly answered “of course!!” when Ni-chan asked whether I was still interested to go.

We took the train and continue with taking bajaj. I was quite worried that I might make us lost and won’t arrived at the event on time. It was my first time to go to the area. The same with Ni-chan and Dona-chan. But, thank’s God, we arrived safely and still have time to do Dzuhur prayer.

The front look of the cafe

After it, we get back to the café where the event was held. We saw some people started to do shooting. I took a picture of them. Then suddenly I was told not to take picture with flashlight because it would bother the shooting. Gomen~~~~

The yellow one was May J