I've just found out that a friend currently is studying in Russia. I've known since long time, that when the friend had something she wanted, she will do anything and worked hard to get it. Going to Russia is one of her dreams, and now she's not only going there but she's living there. I got a feeling that she won't go back here if she can ^^
I'm feeling happy for her accomplish. I'm very happy she can make her dream become true. I'm happy and very proud of her.
I can't lie that I was also envy with her. All this time I only said that I wanted to do this and that, but I never really worked it out. I do many thinking instead that lead me nowhere. I never done what she has done. I never done anything to make my dreams come true. That's why I think myself so lame.....
Once I've said to a friend: "no one is looking normal, everyone is unique and so do you,"
When I gave the advice, the friend was thinking about her so called normal and boring life. Personally I think there's no normal people. Everyone is different. Everyone has their own thinking, their own choice in life. I was feeling so confidence with myself at the time. But sometimes also I can fell very low with myself, like after I've heard about my friend's accomplishments. As if the reality snaps me: "What the hell you've been doing for all this time? What have you achieve? Where will you be in the future? What will you do?".
I guess it comes back to what choice I've made, and the surroundings that make me to have the choice. Just like I've said that no one is the same, that each conditions for each people will always be different, it won't be the same for everyone. So the choices will also be different.
It makes me feel better and don't get that bother anymore about being ordinary. Then again the thinking come, "Is it just an excuse I've made to legitimate myself?"