Thursday, September 23, 2010

Sudden Lost

Lately sad things happen around me…

First, my friend has lost her being born baby. The baby died while still inside the comb, in wait to be born. She said it’s a slow reaction from the “bidan” (traditional delivering baby person) to suggest her to the hospital. On the last minute, she still can feel the baby movement, but it stopped moving on the way to the hospital.

I was very sad with the news. I was hoping for another nephew and also because she’s the first one between my closets friends that will become a mother. She looked very calm when I visited her. I brought her chocolate and grapes. I do hope it would cheer her up. She’s very calm when telling me what has happen, sometimes we laugh. There’s no tears from her. She’s smiling and looking fine. I guess she has overcome the lost. She’s so damn strong! I think I can’t be as strong as her if I was in the same situation. I was glad and relief. Though I know it was terribly hard for her, to lost such soul that she’s expected to have and had taken care for 9 months inside of her. I can feel the lost though I can’t cry a tear. I’m wishing the best for her and pray that the little soul will have the most respectable place beside Allah SWT. Amen.

Second, a sudden death happen to one of my “high position” people at the office. Mr. Mula Harahap, the big boss of Tangga Pustaka has passed away because of an sudden heart attack. He was gone while he’s sleeping. The news shocked me since the day before he passed away, I still seeing him. That time I was thinking to greet him Ied Mubarak, but I didn’t do it. I thought I can do it later. How I regret it now that I won’t ever see him again. I thought maybe I could have his last smile….

Mr. Mula was one of my respectable person. I rarely have people that I respected, so maybe he’s the only one. He’s tall and looking scary with his white hair, but the truth he’s warm and kind inside. One thing I’m so grateful was that I don’t feel as scared as the first time when I saw him. I can greet and see his warm smile, listen to his funny stories and jokes.

I have this wishes to show him this blog. I always remember his words at one training that I participated.

“A writer mustn’t stop writing and reading. Keep writing though it may be meaningless. Keep reading no matter how busy you are.”

His words has also encourage me to maintenance this world of mine. I wanted to show him the writings I’ve made. I want to know his opinions. I thought finally I have someone that I can ask his opinions for my stories. Now, all of it will be just a wishing and thought. I can’t ask him to do it now. I don’t want to bother his eternal sleep.

Sayounara Mula-san…though it’s a short time but I’m glad I can meet you. Thanks for your sharing experiences and stories. You will surely be miss.

p.s. Was it a premonition? After the Ied Mubarak holiday, I was cleaning files on my laptop. One of the folder there was named “Pak Mula”. It’s the file of his training I’ve been participated. The training was postponed and so I still keep the training files, incase it will be started again someday. I was confused that time, should I delete it or not? Since the postponed has taken long time. But, I decide to keep it, maybe it would be useful later. Several days later Mr. Mula passed away…Now I think I can delete the files. Since he won’t started the training again. So, was it a premonition?? 

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